stay at home dads

The End of the Dumb Dad Era

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There's a great article in the Washington Post today from author and stay-at-home dad Chad Prevost that's worth reading, "Why this is the end of the dumb dad era." What resonated with me was this passage:

"No, the domestic hemisphere is not for the faint of heart. Not just because it’s hard. It is definitely another job, but it’s also often humble work, tending to others and scheduling your life around their schedules, while remaining engaged enough to be emotionally present for your kids. There’s little external reward, and for many smart and driven people, even when you do it well, it’s not enough."

That is right on the money. 

One of the most common responses I get from people (both men and women) when I tell them I stay at home is usually something like "Well, that's definitely a hard job," or, "I could never do it." But I'm lucky we can afford to make the decision to have a stay-at-home parent in the first place, and the truth is the tasks themselves aren't that difficult. However the responsibility and selflessness that it takes to get the work done makes the job pretty tough some days. 

So I usually respond by saying, "Well, it's the job that needs to get done."

Why this is the end of the dumb dad era, Chad Prevost [Washington Post]

Two Girls Are Best

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My last post for Man of the House is about a study that said the family configuration that results in the "happiest" family was two girls. As this happens to be the configuration of my own happy family, I had some thoughts of my own.

My editor changed what I originally wrote a bit, replacing my final paragraph with another. I still like mine better, so I thought I'd include it here:

I can't say what it's like to have more than two kids and I definitely don't know what it's like to be the father of a boy, but having two girls is pretty great. Before we had our second daughter I used to say to people that we had the first child for us, and the second child for our first. And while there is some truth to that, the older they get I'm realizing that it's the dynamic between the two that makes everything in our family more fun. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

Are Two Daughters the Key to a Happy Family?  [manofthehouse.com]

New Stay-At-Home Dad "Web Series" on Atom.com

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MTV's let's-make-some-viral-funny-online-videos site Atom.com has a new "Web series" about a Stay-At-Home Dad called (wait for it) "Stay-At-Home Dad." Even though - or maybe because - I automatically have my guard up anytime anything in the mainstream media deals with at-home Dads, I checked it out immediately.

(As an aside, I'm not going to pretend that this "Web series" isn't in the mainstream media. It's owned by MTV and a freaking publicist emailed me about it today. Also, will I ever not feel odd using the term "Web series"?)

Expecting to hate it, I watched all three episodes and although it isn't exactly comedy genius - there were some pretty funny moments. But best of all, it portrays an At-Home Dad that's neither some sort of lame, emasculated super-Dad, nor a bumbling all-thumbs idiot. The Dad in the show is just kind of a surly a-hole. And although he's certainly not the typical At-Home Dad, he might be that Dad we secretly feel like in the back of our minds (at least from time-to-time).

So, like Brian was writing over at Rebel Dad, I think the jury might still be out on this one. But for me at least, until they do an episode where it's supposed to be funny because he can't change a diaper, I'm going to give it the thumbs up.

Stay-At-Home-Dad at Atom.com

Stay-At-Home Dads Going Back To Work in the Wall Street Journal

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There's a good article in today's Wall Street Journal about At-Home Dads trying to get back into the work force. There are as many different reasons for staying at home or going back to work as there are At-Home Dads, but the article does a good job of illustrating a few different situations. Whether Dads decide to go back to school to give them a competitive edge or keep themselves in their industry with freelance work, the smart Dads play the hiring/interview game without discounting their time as primary caregivers.

In a world that pays a lot of lip service to those who "think outside of the box," I can't think of anything in my life that has made me do so more than staying at home with my kids. As featured father David Hallowes says, the "challenges and self-reflection of the past 2 1/2 years will make him a better manager."

Daunting Task for Mr. Mom: Get a Job - WSJ.com

[And for the record, shame on whomever wrote the lazy "Mr. Mom" headline.]